Ferd Week continues with a comment left by Ferd, April, 2011, on the post, "Can you still be preppy if you......"
Jet ski and snow board instead of sail and ski?
No. Jet Skis make too much noise to be preppy. Snow boarding is vulgar. By the way, if you sail anywhere other than off the coast of Rhode Island, Maine or Massachusetts (or from Newport to Bermuda) you are not preppy. If you ski anywhere other than Maine and New Hampshire, you are not preppy. (West Side of New York City regarding Vermont, take note.)
Vacation at theme parks?
Is Acadia National Park count as a theme park? Of course not. True prep doesn't even know where Florida is.
Vacation on cruise ships?
Why would you go to someone else's boat to vacation when you can go to your own boat? Ridiculous inquiry.
Put chemicals/fertilizers/dyed mulch on your lawn?
Honestly, very few true preps have lawns, per se. If there is something worth mowing, that is done by the husband with a 37 year old push mower. Believe me, he is not thinking about fertilizer.
Get your suits at Jos. A Banks?
True Prep doesn't 'get' suits anywhere. I have not heard of Jos. A Banks, but I suspect it is a chain store. Boys from St. Paul's do not shop. Suits are either handed down or purchased by their mother and then kept for 39 years.
Eat family dinners at local chain restaurant?
Prep parents and prep children, when they are at the family home at the same time (which is rarely) never eat together. Period. Except sometimes at Christmas.
Drive a car that gets less than 15 miles per gallon?
Yes. Most preps drive only two or three types of cars, the older versions of which do average less than 15 mpg. Examples are my aunt's 1978 Volvo, my brother's 1959 Jaguar and my mother's 1990 Land Rover County.
(For women) Wear more than two kinds of make-up?
Yes. Lip Gloss and soap. Scented soap is make up, isn't it?
Shop at Walmart, Kohl's, Target, Ikea and other box stores?
Yes, actually, this is very prep. Nobody is tight with money like true prep. How do you think they have money for 10 generations? Spending it on Gucci's?
Have kitchens with lots of granite and stainless steel?
Granite belongs in New Hampshire. Enough about this.
Have Louis Vuitton luggage and/or handbags?
Unless these are sold at Eye of the Needle, no.
Get plastic surgery?
Prep women actually want to age. The absolute goal of every prep woman is to be 70 with swept back gray hair and grandchildren at Middlesex. Prep men are born looking 40. Why would we want to change this?
Come from some place other than New England?
Accurately, the question should be: come from a place other than Maine, New Hampshire, Massachusetts and a few zip codes in Rhode Island? Connecticut is full of bleached blond investment banker's wive who drive Geladenwagons and play tennis. Please.
Get all of your antiques from shops and flea markets rather than from family members?
Yes, this is actually very preppy.
Drive a non-European car?
Yes, as long as they are one of the following: 1978 Ford Country Squire Station Wagon; 1983 Ford Bronco II with 29 Nantucket Beach Permit Stickers or 1968 Jeepster with 49 Nantucket Beach Permit Stickers.